Harassment in North Africa
Several female bloggers have written about the harassment that they get from Moroccan men. I became fairly immune to it, and even found it humorous at times - for example, when a boy of about 17 attempted to follow me home from the McDonald’s in Agdal. I turned to him and said (in patchy darija) “I have a husband waiting at home. You’re so little, you could be my son. What do you think we’re going to do? Go home to your mommy.” (Ok, exaggerating on the son thing, but he had such a baby face.)
There have been other incidents where men would follow me in their cars down the street - pulling up and stopping, trying to talk to me as I stomped past them, then pulling ahead again and stopping. They didn’t care if I said I had a husband, but once I said that my husband was Moroccan, their expressions morphed from leering to fearful. With lots of “smahali”s, they would zip away immediately.
And you know, it’s funny - I’m not immune to a good looking man, but these guys are shooting themselves in the foot. I certainly wouldn’t cheat on my husband (it would be impossible, anyway, the whole country reports on my activities!), but I wouldn’t mind being friendly - chatting for a moment, or even having a coffee. The only problem is, I can’t - because they take that as an invitation for sex! I was once at a little club in Marrakech called Bodega, dancing and having a great time, when I made the mistake of waving to a guy who was watching me dance. My husband was with me, and the guy came up to him and basically said, “Hey, this gaouria you’re with, is she available?” A fight was narrowly averted. I was told later that even making eye contact with a man is suggestive. Sheesh.
So what is my point with all of this? Well, I’ve been considering the American University in Cairo for a master’s, and when I mentioned it to my husband, his answer was, “I won’t allow it, it’s too dangerous there for you.” Which I laughed at, because he knows I’ll do what I damn well please, and he has unexplainable suspicions about many places - Fes and Oujda are the main ones. It turns out that perhaps he was right - I can’t even believe what happened in Cairo after Eid. !!!!! I’ll take the Moroccan style of harassment any day over that kind of violent aggression. Totally ridiculous.
November 12th, 2006 at 2:46 pm
Shit happens out there, look at this video
November 12th, 2006 at 3:22 pm
Interestingly, I am harrassed far more often in Morocco than I ever have been in Cairo, or anywhere else in Egypt. As you know, I don’t take a light view of it and I would have paid big money to have seen your husband make glue out of that guy in Marrakech.
November 12th, 2006 at 5:21 pm
Cat > There have been quite a few “almost fights” where Moroccans just thought I was a tourist. It seems that Moroccan males are sort of like…um, hippos, or something…a lot of blustering and roaring, but no real fisticuffs. I’m the one waving knives at people who threaten dogs, LOL.
Adel > Yes, I saw that video. Terrifying.
November 13th, 2006 at 9:11 am
This is such a huge problem in Morocco. I wrote a piece on it for a Moroccan magazine just recently. These men have got to get a grip.
November 13th, 2006 at 8:54 pm
Ooo, ooo, I want to read the article!
February 10th, 2008 at 11:37 pm
[…] In casual situations, there are some other colloquial (local dialect) words to use for apologizing. In Morocco, the word سمحلي (smahali) is used to apologize. This word literally means “forgive me”. The word is appropriate to use if you are late, need to get one’s attention, etc. This is also a good word for women to know, since unfortunately harassment does happen. There have been other incidents where men would follow me in their cars down the street - pulling up and stopping, trying to talk to me as I stomped past them, then pulling ahead again and stopping. They didn’t care if I said I had a husband, but once I said that my husband was Moroccan, their expressions morphed from leering to fearful. With lots of “smahali”s, they would zip away immediately. - (Harassment in North Africa) […]