Maryam has an excellent post up about beauty on the outside vs. real beauty on the inside. It reminded me of my first visit to Morocco, where I experienced the heady glee of suddenly being a goddess – for the first time in my life, pretty much every man within shouting distance swore I was Aphrodite’s reincarnation, and I loved it.
Then I woke up, but not entirely – I realized that while most of these men were after one thing, they were right, in a way – I am beautiful, even though I’m not blonde, my butt is too big, and my features have been likened to those of a kewpie doll. [exaggerated, too big for my face] When I met an Irish girl who had the same complaints about her hair as I do [not straight, not curly, pretty much does whatever it wants], I thought, Thank God, I’m normal. Forget all this straightening/perming/processing, I’m just going to go with it, and get a blowout if I really have to have it straight. I only wish I could make young Moroccan girls realize the same thing – if I see another one whose gorgeous black hair has been streaked with some sort of ashy fake blond, I’m going to have a fit. My sister-in-law wanted to put henna on her hair so she’d “have red in it!” like mine, and I was horrified. I’m not against hair dying by any means, but when you have the most lovely hair ever, is it not the ultimate hubris to try to improve on it? Her hair is the kind that you imagine Scheherazade would have had – like a silky black river, just a little wavy, with a natural shine.
So today, my wish is for all women to recognize their innate beauty. Let’s revel in our uniqueness, not struggle with impossible standards.
My other wish is for Moroccan men to treat all women with respect, as if they were talking to a sister – but I’m not holding my breath.
See that hair? Would YOU try to fight it? 
Jill
January 31, 2007 at 8:46 pm
I have the same hair type – not straight, not curly, does what it wants, which is usually to get all knotted in my sleep so I have to load it up with conditioner in the shower and comb it out. On a daily basis. I’m only learning, at 25, not to wash it every day.
Actually, today was one of those days, but it was a bit tangled, so being late for work, I just brushed it as best I could and wore it down. In class, I was teaching my 14-year-old students “should” and “shouldn’t,” and given that the class was mostly girls, I asked for hair advice. Immediately, one of my snarkier students said:
“You should wash it.”
Awesome.
(I know this entry was not about hair, but it was so relevant I couldn’t resist)
Felix
January 31, 2007 at 9:39 pm
I love that story, and my post was sort of about hair in a roundabout way…do they come by that snarkiness naturally, or are you being a good influence on them?
Aimee
February 1, 2007 at 12:46 pm
Yes, you are beautiful. I agree that we should all have that feeling that we are attractive. Frankly, that’s a feeling that’s been missing from my life for a couple years (since gaining lots of weight during/after my last relationship) and I didn’t realize I was missing it. I got a little of it back in Morocco and am thankful. I didn’t get lude comments (at least didn’t hear/understand them), but a lot of once over glances and some sweet “would you like to watch the stars with me” type requests. To be honest, the attention was flattering and the feeling must have lasted because my mother even said that I looked prettier the last time she saw me.
As an aside, I too hate it when women with gorgeous dark hair lighten it up. It always looks wrong. And, even though I have blondish hair, I used to fantasize about having long straight/wavy thick black hair, but with my pasty pink English skin I would look freakish with really dark hair.
Jill – I like that your students feel free to be so frank with you. You must be a good influence.
Myrtus
February 1, 2007 at 2:54 pm
Liosliath, I think you look adorable! Your gorgeous hair, your beautiful features…no doubt the creator took his time and some serious consideration on your design, with not only beauty but a good set of brains in mind. (:
Paul O Mahony
February 1, 2007 at 4:59 pm
Tres Belle! I like your hair, at least you have plenty of it, unlike yours truly;-)
Maryam in Marrakesh
February 2, 2007 at 3:59 pm
What a nice post. Here and here.
Kelley
February 2, 2007 at 10:11 pm
I am of Irish descent. I have the same sort of hair. Tangles have been a close personal friend of mine. Personally, I think you’re beautiful and nothing of a kewpie doll that I can see. As I’m an artist, you’d be the perfect model and muse. (And no, this isn’t intended as a come on.) Anyway, great post on women and beauty.
Felix
February 2, 2007 at 10:43 pm
Aimee- Honey, you’re preaching to the choir. After I came back to the States, I gained ALL the weight back that I lost in Morocco. You just let me know, and we’ll go on a spa holiday to Essaouira – eating fresh fruit and fish + running around on the beach does wonders.
Myrtus – Thank you…I was going to say that’s the third thing we agree on, until I realized how arrogant it would be, LOL.
Kelley – YES! Another Irish girl with my hair problems! We should start a support group. I keep wondering how my ancestors ever managed without detangler. Do you have your artwork up anywhere for others to admire?
Myrtus
February 3, 2007 at 12:19 am
LOL that’s quite alright dear, everyone here agrees anyway. Some people say if you got it, flaunt it, but I know that’s not how you are. (: